In every situation we may find a valuable lesson. A few years ago when we were moving to our new home I was faced with the challenging task of packing my storage closet. As I stood in front of my belongings I realized I had collected so many items that I had forgotten about and no longer felt a need for. It was a big mess and I did not know where to start. There were so many things that I did not need anymore, yet I still had a very difficult time parting from. In that moment I decided to separate the items and label them in to three groups: Necessities, Memorabilia, and Let-goes.
As I evaluated each item, I noticed how easily we lose sight of what we have possessed after we stop using them. There are clothing items, gifts, letters, magazines, and so many other things that we do not really need any longer, but we hold on to them guessing they may be used in the future. Our minds get cluttered in the same way. We have so many events, incidents, understandings, meanings, and thoughts that have served their functions, yet we are not convinced that it is time to sort them out, keep the keepers and let go of the used ones. I guess we all ask the same question: what if some day I may need it and regret throwing it away?
The more we hold on to the old news, the less space is provided for the information that may be relevant to our present conditions. Recollection of the past stressors, shame of the perceived failures, anguish of the old losses, or fear of re-experiencing old suffering often drain us. Eventually we end up losing the ability to focus on what is useful today. In such a cluttered mental closet, imagine how hard it will be to find what you may immediately need?
No matter how small or big your closet is or how good your organizational skills are, once you stop managing it, at some point you run out of space or time. . Our mind works in a similar fashion. Our feelings, assumptions, expectations, and beliefs are compiling in every second and at some point we need to clear the mental and emotional closet in order to make room for new ones.
Joy and creativity need space to flourish. By banishing the old and depressing stories in your mind and developing new interests you are able to provide an internal capacity for happiness and hope. The difference between your storage closet and your mind’s is “blind spots”. You can directly look into the closet and label your items, but it is hard to label what is on your mind. That is why you may need someone who you trust and can help you with labeling your feelings. Your freedom from the extra baggage allows you to move lighter and organize your mental capacity for receiving future benefits.
The more you wait and drag on the heavy weight of the unusable stuff, the more energy is lost and the less comfort is experienced.
Let go of the irrelevant thoughts, keep the ones that bring you joy, and utilize the ones that have efficiently worked for you.
Dr. Sadigh’s one on one sessions, group classes, seminars, and integrative programs specialize in pointing out the “blind spots”. He enhances his client’s ability to desensitize old worries, process new understandings, and replace negative outlooks with a positive attitude in service of success and happiness. Visit Dr. Sadigh at www.counselinginlosangeles.com